Broken arrow
by claws2501
Summary: This is my first songfic so please beware when reading. disclaimers to George Lucas, i don't own any of these characters and also to Pixe lott from whence the song came from I am not making profit from it. Set a year after the rise of the empire obi-dala


**Hello readers, so this is a songfic which came to me when listening to my music on my bb (cuz i don't have an ipod) and reliesed that this is a perfect obi-dala song, it is from the song 'broken arrow' by Pixe Lott. However before you read beware of two things. The first is that I have never ever acutally read or wrote an obi-dala fic before EVER, and the second is that I have never wrote a songfic ever. But don't let that put you off because you know what they say about practice making perfect. So if you liked it please review and if you didn't please review anyway because that is the only way I will learn. So on with the story...  
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><p><em>What do you do when you're stuck,<br>Because the one that you love,  
>Has pushed you away,<br>And you can't deal with the pain_,

It was a year since that fateful day. A year since the love of her life: Anakin Skywalker had died, locked and sealed in the cold metal suit. A whole year since he, as Lord Vader had killed hundreds of his own, slashing and hacking them like they were nothing more than animals. She walked to one of the many shelves in her apartment, this one stacked with various holovids. She pulled one out almost and random but with such precision. She knew that this was what she had been searching for. It was the wedding ceremony, the one which he, Anakin Skywalker, her hero, had declared his love for her sealing it with the swapping of rings. She still wore hers, did he? She hoped not, it wouldn't be right, her Anakin was dead and she would not be married to the monster who had taken his place. As she flicked through the pictures she remembered...

He had stopped by her, no their apartment; she had seen the smoke spiralling from the temple. On the holonet it was rumoured that a battle was taking place. She had been scared, terrified, Anakin, the one which she loved was in the thick of it. Now, with hindsight she could laugh mirthlessly as she remembered that he had indeed been in the middle but he had been on the wrong side. The pure light that had been him had dulled and blackened. She hadn't known any of this, instead she thought that he had been mature, choosing to side with freedom instead of the one which had raised him. She believed him. She trusted him, and he had betrayed her. Never again would she give her heart to another for fear of it just being discarded and ripped to shreds like the slave boy from Tatooine had done to her previously.

She flashed out of the memory; it was causing her too much pain, another memory came to her unbidden, unburied for the first time in a year. The tragic time on Mustafa, the fiery planet. Lord Vader had tried to convince her to remain at his side, through thick and thin. Better or for worst was her marriage vows and yet, she reasoned that those were to a different man. She remembered the same Lord Vader clenching his fist and her feeling it around her neck, it had been horrible and if the unforgiving planet had stilled and everything quietened he would have been able to hear her heart breaking. She had blacked out. What was the point? She had thought, what was the point in living anymore? Her Ani was gone, dead to the world, the twins would never be safe and she had been so tired. It was as if she had played out her entire life, there was nothing else for here now. Not even the twins.

_And now you're trying to fix me,  
>Mend what he did,<br>I'll find the piece that I'm missing_,

She remembered the talk she had had with Obi-Wan, her husband's mentor, father, friend, brother and so much more. She remembered hating him for he was going to kill Anakin. But yet again that day, or next for it had spanned over several, she found herself reminding her heart that Anakin was long dead and all Obi-Wan would be doing was preserving the memory of the hero before he could do anymore damage. It was he who had been through it all. He who had understood a little about what she was going through, the betrayal and heart break, because he was going through the same. She remembered also the way he had come back for her. The way the calloused hands caressed her neck looking for a pulse. The way which she had been carried tenderly onto the ship and back off it when they had reached Alderaan. He was there reassuring her and comforting her in a time which she needed it most. Filling the empty chasm which Anakin had left behind with light against the writhing tendrils of darkness in her soul, she herself might not have been Force-Sensitive and never would have been a Sith but would have instead be an ultimate victory over the senate and be used as a leash for Lord Vader. He had been there for the birth of her and Anakin's twins. Their own flesh and blood, and even though she loved them seeing them had made her cry. They were theirs, hers and anakins own flesh and blood but would never know a father, they had been brought into a world which was so corrupted and full of hatred that she, for a second wanted to undo the birth and wished she could delay or even had an abortion. And yet, the look on their faces was so pure and uncorrupted it made her cry happy tears.

She remembered glancing at the man who had made all this reality, he who had shone a lantern through the chasm of her heart to give her a reason to live, and that reason was the twins and, with the twins came something else, something so familiar and yet unfamiliar she had shied away from it before accepting fully. Love, not the twisted kind which Anakin had turned their relationship into, the possessive love which had warped his sense of reality. This was purer than the love between two adults, this was the love of mother and child repeated twice over and sealed with the loyalty and ferociousness of Anakin's spirit. But he wasn't there to witness it, his master had been. He who had cut the cord, he who had presented her with the babies and stood by her throughout the labour. He who had saved her, for she knew that if she would have quite willingly been able to give up life to rest in eternity. But now she couldn't, there was too much to fight for. She glanced at Obi-Wan and smiled, and to her surprise he smiled back, a smile which made him look incredibly handsome, it lit up his whole face and his eyes, the blue grey orbs suddenly seemed to change colour to light blue. The colour of Anakin's eyes she reminded herself with a pang of grief and love.

_But I still miss him,  
>I miss him, I'm missing him,<br>Oh I miss him, I miss him I'm missing him_

She flashed out once more, she had fallen asleep, it was like this most days. She rarely slept anymore. She went to bed sure but she never dreamt just remembered until she could stand it no more and would rise out of her bed and scream at the moon or pace the corridors of her apartment. She had stopped crying long ago, what was the point? Crying would prove to those visiting her that she hadn't moved on, and in the circles that she moved in, trying still to keep in politics, it would reach the ears of the Chancellor, no no, the emperor, soon enough and then onto Lord Vader. She had stopped crying, but had also stopped living. She was just functioning. Even the twins had been taken from her, ripped from each other and sent across the galaxy. She had at first agreed with this, they had been a constant reminder that Anakin wasn't there and would never be. Ever. Now, she wished she could see them so that not all her memories of her loveable, brave, loyal husband were tarnished and that she could look back on some of the happier memories during existed. But she wasn't alone. There was someone there. Obi-Wan had stayed true to Anakin's promise all those years ago to look after her in the event of her death. They both viewed him as dead and so Obi-Wan looked out for her and she looked out for him. They had grown to be close friends over this past year. Maybe closer and yet they were too scared to admit it. They had travelled past the safe lands of friendship and into the precarious land beyond, neither had a name for journey they were on, nor the path which they had found themselves.

_And you're sitting in the front row,  
>Wanna be first in line,<br>Sitting by my window,  
>Giving me all your time,<em>

She looked up as she heard a shuttle land and a figure get it, like her, Obi-Wan was the only other important public figure which wasn't prosecuted by the Empire. He was free to walk about the Capital planet thought neither like to. For them it reminded them too much of things past. One of the windows in Padmé's apartment had been boarded up so that she couldn't view the temple. It was left as it had been for a whole year now. The younglings and masters lying side by side where they had fallen, a token, a symbol the death of an old age and a rise to the new. Nobody could fathom why. Why had it been left? Why was she and Obi-Wan left unprosecuted? Well she had one theory for herself. But Obi-Wan...

"Padmé" the voice came through the door; it wasn't a question to be let in, far from it, but a statement just to say that he was there. It was a siren's call to her, she had to answer. Slowly she got up from where she was sitting and walked to the door.

"Ben" she said, it was a unspoken agreement to call him that, moving away from 'Obi-Wan' meant that she wasn't consistently reminded of the Jedi, of Him. It also allowed their friendship to be easier and the grounds beyond it a little more stable. Anakin and Obi-Wan had been like brothers and to Padmé it felt wrong to be even slightly infatuated with the brother of her husband. While her husband lay, locked in a cold metal suit, becoming a symbol for oppression and hatred, she was living a relatively normal life. He came in and shook his short hair to be rid of the water dripping down his back.

"What happened to you" she asked curiously, the climate was controlled on the planet, it never rained ever, producing it artificially wasn't possible and nor did anyone want it to be for there was always a danger of producing acid rain. Ben shrugged and walked over wrapping his arms around her small frame. He slowly rotated her from side to side. They stood still. Padme put her head on his chest in the same way she had...No she all but screamed at herself don't think about it, just don't think about it. She heard his breath hitch in his throat and felt his heart speed up under the touch of her hand. It was all the same reactions that...no she couldn't think his name she couldn't. Yet she did...Anakin.

Her reactions were almost spontaneous; she ripped herself from his embrace and began to sob putting her hand up to eyes to cover them. It was safer that way, she didn't have to see his hurt reaction. She sat down in front of the sofa as the holovid played out in front of her doing nothing to ease the pain. But there was no pained expression to see, instead only understanding, pure and simple.

_You could be my hero,  
>If only I could let go,<em>

She couldn't say sorry to him, the man which she had hurt because that meant that she wouldn't do it again. That would be a lie because she would do it again and again. She cried all the harder, if only she could just let go, to stop feeling, to lie down and seize up. These thoughts came to her more frequently than she would admit to anyone. Herself, Ben, The Force. She wanted to be with Ben, he who had been so kind to her, and yet something was holding her back. Just one word, one man, a legend: Anakin Skywalker.

_But his love has still hit me,  
>Like a broken arrow.<br>Like a broken arrow.  
><em>

A movement next to her caught her attention, the whole sofa sagged as Ben sat down next to her. He looked at her pitifully and then at the holovid which was playing out. It was doing no good to either of them to remember. She had to let him go. He had to let him go, but they couldn't because he was still alive somewhere in that suit lay the Anakin they both loved. They didn't want to lose hope. Padme looked up at him meekly, she went to cover her eyes again but Ben caught them.

"Come here" he murmured and pulled her into another embrace, not one of lovers, or even friends but one of comfort and security. She responded and snuggled into him still crying as they both watched the holovid come to an end. Padmé cried harder as she watched the couple on the balcony of Naboo kiss. She wished to go back to that feeling of euphoria of pure, undiluted happiness but she couldn't. She looked up to see Ben's face and was momentarily surprised. She had expected to find jealousy etched on his face but instead love and sympathy softening his features. It was a rare thing to come by nowadays and it was a breath of fresh air of Padmé.

Anakin on the holo moved for a second kiss, this time without the veil on, the kiss of man to wife. Suddenly she felt soft caressing lips on her cheek, she turned her head. Not away from the comfort but towards it, towards him, she relished the feel of it, the butterflies in the stomach, all these sensations which she had come to associate with love, with Anakin. She broke away calmly but remained in his embrace watching the film finally come to an end. Anakin was beaming on the holoprojecter laughed and waved at the camera giving thumbs up. It was as if he was giving his blessing to them...But that was stupid...Wasn't it?

_What do you do  
>When your hearts in two places?<br>You feel great but you're torn inside.  
>You feel love but you just can't embrace it,<br>When you found the right one at the wrong time.  
><em>

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><p><strong>So there we have it, short I know, so anyway i really did enjoy writing this but did you enjoy reading it. Please review if you want me to actually continue this into a story or if I should stop writing songfics all together<strong>_. _**Please review**

**Subaquakat xxx.**


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